Moving Forward
by QuinnoftheMoon
Summary: Maura is attacked and keeping it a secret from the ones she loves. How will she move forward and how will people find out? Sorry I am bad at summaries, but I am fixing a story that I made in the past and trying to improve it. I want to mention that I am a Maurkie fan and I am sorry to disappoint those that aren't. Also I am sad to say(may he rest in peace), but there is no Frost:(
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1 Moving Forward Fanfiction**

It was six forty-three pm by the time I realized I should have left work nearly two hours ago. I must have gotten lost in my work, like I always do. Examining dead bodies was just so simple for me; I was in my own world away from all the humans that fuck shit up. The bodies don't talk and have emotions. Everything in the Lab was simple, there was no questioning what things could or might be. It's all just Scientific Facts!

The lab was empty everyone that was living and breathing went home, except for me. When I realized what time it was I went to my office and hung up my coat. I turned off the lights and for some reason I decided I would go out the back way instead of taking the elevator. Maybe I thought it was quicker to get to my car, or maybe I just didn't want the desk officer to crack jokes again about me always working. I walked back through the lab slowly making my way to where they roll the bodies in on gurneys. As I walked through the double doors a gust of freezing wind gushed in. I tightened my body and rapidly rubbed my hands together trying to warm up my body as I treaded slowly through the corridor.

It was dark with little to no light to be seen at the end of the long single car entrance. Suddenly something hit me over the head, it felt like a thousand needles hitting my body as I fell to the ground. It didn't completely knock me out, but everything was hazy and out of sorts. I could barely make out two sets of feet while I was lying on the ground. I felt a grab at my arm as I was pulled to my feet and pushed against the chain link fence. They pulled my hands over my head and handcuffed them so I couldn't escape. I tried keeping my eyes open, but I couldn't my body was cold and my head was pounding and before I knew it I finally lost conciseness.

When I finally came to everything was so much clearer, my eyes had finally acclimated to the darkness and my head wasn't throbbing as much. I tried pulling myself away from the fence and then I realizing what had happened before I passed out. The men must have heard me rattle the chain link, because they came back wearing black ski masks that only showed their eyes. I began to scream when one of the men jolted and put his hand over my mouth and told me if I screamed again they would kill me. He was holding a knife to my throat when he said it, so I knew he wasn't lying. I had recognized his voice, but I was unable to figure out from where.

They grabbed me by my hips and slammed me into the fence, before they started unbuttoning my top. The shorter hazel-eyed man that reeked of whiskey lifted up his mask just so that his lips were exposed. He put his mouth on my neck, I flinched at the touch and I started to tear up; I knew what was going to happen next. The man made his way lower to my breasts and unclasped my black lace bra. He molested my breasts for only a few minutes before the other man asked for his turn. He moved away while the other taller blue-eyed man came up and started to unzip my skirt and remove my black lace underwear. They both removed their belts and dropped their pants to the ground. As I heard the metal hit the concrete I started to beg them to let me go. I began to panic and told them I wouldn't say anything if they just left. They gave a small laugh and began touching me again.

I thought if only I left earlier or if I had taken the elevator this wouldn't have happened. Then I wondered how they knew I would go out the back, and if they were waiting for me or waiting for just anyone to leave the lab. Was I just random or had these men planned to rape me. I kept trying to come up with some explanation for why this happened, but I couldn't think I felt completely out of place. I couldn't tell which way was up, down, left, or right; I was spinning. Why would they want to attack me, especially when I was so involved with the Homicide Unit?

As each one of them took their turns thrusting into me with force I would tear up from the pain. I felt like I was being ripped open from the inside out. I had heard many stories of rape, but never thought it could happen to me. I don't know how I am supposed to get past this; I don't know how anyone does. They both had their turns three times, and in between they would torture me. The first time they hit me in the abdomen quite a bit and strangled me until I nearly passed out. The second time they sliced a good-sized gash just above my belly button, when they did that I tried not to scream like they had told me but I couldn't help it. And the third time was different, they attacked me with words. The main thing that the emphasized on was for me to keep quite. The told me to not tell anyone, especially in the Homicide Unit. I thought it was weird that they emphasized on the Homicide unit, but maybe they just knew I was really involved with them.

I began searching their bodies when they were getting dressed to see if they had identifying marks to tell me who they were. It then hit me and I realized that they were cops. One of them had a tattoo on his wrist and it answered my suspicions. They were both detectives in the homicide unit and they worked along side Jane many times before. That's why they want me to keep quite, because they didn't want anyone at the precinct finding out. I also knew the detectives myself from a few cases. The shorter hazel-eyed mans name is Christopher Jennings; he has a wife, a nine-year-old son, and a four-year-old daughter. The taller blue-eyed man was Robie Malinski; he is widowed and has a fourteen-year-old son. Jennings and Malinski are partners and apparently for more then just police work.

They un-cuffed my hands after they were redressed and I fell straight to the cold concrete floor. As I was on my knees I watched them high-five each other as the walked away. I didn't know what to do next, but I knew I couldn't go to the hospital, and I that couldn't tell Jane. I was scared and ashamed of what happened to me, but I knew if I told anyone that they raped me they would come after me and possibly do it again. I kept lying to myself saying I was going to be okay. As I stood up I used my left hand trying to close the wound on my stomach and picked up my clothes with my right hand before making my way back into the lab.

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><p><strong>I edited my original story, because it wasn't set up very well. I will be working on redoing my next chapter soon, and for the mean time reviews would be nice. This story may be slow coming along because I am very busy, but I will be giving a finished story at some point in the future. Thanks for reading!<strong>


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2 Moving forward fanfiction**

As I entered the lab I flicked on the lights and shielded my eyes from the brightness. I was cold and slightly wet from the puddle of rainwater on the hard concrete ground in the morgue's corridor. I felt so violated and used. I was covered in my red sticky blood from the big gaping cut on my abdomen. What am I supposed to do? I was just attacked and afraid to tell anyone, but I needed some help from anyone except Jane or Korsak.

I made my way to my office and locked the door behind me. I needed to do a rape kit to check for tearing, but I couldn't go to the hospital or my attackers would likely know. I made my way to my desk and plopped down in my chair. I was whimpering from the pain and I was just hoping to wake up from this nightmare. I slowly stretched out my arm to pick up the phone, but before I made my call I examined the cuts and bruises on my wrists. I kept thinking to myself that this didn't happen; maybe I fell asleep somehow while doing my autopsy or maybe I was still sleeping from the previous night. How was I, Dr. Maura Isles, attacked and raped? I had always been so careful and never imagined why anybody would want to do this to me.

I had finally started dialing my co-workers number just praying that they would pick up their phone. The phone rang three times before Susie answered and she seemed angry and tired. She asked why I woke her up, and then I glanced at the time on the phone and realized it was just past midnight. I knew I had been with the men for a long time, but I didn't realize it had been over five hours. I hesitated, questioning if I really wanted to do this. I asked her to go by my house to pick up my black turtleneck and some jeans before coming to the lab. Susie seemed really annoyed and asked if she could just do it in the morning. I begged her, telling her I needed help and I had lost a lot of blood. Her tone of voice changed immediately and I could practically hear her putting on her shoes through the phone. She said that she would see me in thirty minutes and immediately hung up.

Twenty-seven minutes later she rapidly knocked on my door. I got up and opened it, while trying to hide behind door hoping I could spare the last few seconds of her not looking at me with pity. This was it the moment that she would never treat me the same. She took a few steps in while I tried to close the door behind her, but then someone stopped it. I gave out a weak scream before I realized it was Frankie. He looked at me with such sad eyes and he didn't even have to ask me to realize what happened. Frankie and I always had that chemistry with each other; we knew exactly how the other one was just by looking at them. We had a couple of flirtatious moments in the past, but I never knew he cared so much for me. I never would have thought he would have showed up for me in a time of need. He was just Jane's brother; it's not like we were really close or spent a lot of time getting to know one another.

As Susie set the clothes on the couch Frankie wrapped me in his arms. I began crying in his shoulder, I felt a little bit safer now that he was here protecting me. After a minute or so I started to feel angry. I immediately shoved Frankie away and asked what he was doing here. I never called him, and didn't want him to know what happened because then he would tell Jane. I turned to Susie and asked her why she told Frankie, and she said that he was with his mom at my place getting ready to leave when she showed up. She said he asked a lot of questions about what was wrong and that she just told him I needed help and he invited himself along. I was still angry, but I didn't have the energy to argue with them. I was still bleeding and needed to stitch up my wounds.

I asked Susie to to do a rape kit, and she asked me why I couldn't go to a hospital. I told her I couldn't tell anyone and that the only reason she knew was because I couldn't stitch myself up, and the only reason Frankie knew was because she told him. They asked me what happened and I made them both promise not to tell anyone. I told them that they were wearing masks and I didn't exactly know why they even attacked me, but that they handcuffed me to the fence and raped me.

We walked to the autopsy room and I started removing my clothing. I cried from the pain, everything was so bloody. I lied down on the autopsy table and spread my legs. I never even worried about Frankie seeing me so exposed, I didn't care I felt like I was nothing and that it didn't matter if he saw me naked. Frankie was a gentleman though and looked away until I was covered with a blanket. He stayed by my shoulder the entire time and held my hand through every exam without leaving my side.

It took Susie nearly an hour to finish the rape kit and stitch up my wounds. Once we were done I went back to my office and changed into my new clothes before the others entered. I walked over to the white couch where Frankie was now sitting and curled up in his arms. I rested my head on his chest, and intertwined my hands with his. Shortly after we all got comfortable I fell asleep knowing for the night at least I was safe.

When I woke Susie was watching me from the chair on the other side of the glass coffee table, and Frankie still had me wrapped in his arms. I asked what time it was and Susie said it was almost seven. I told them that they didn't have to stay, but both of them said that they weren't going to just leave me after what happened. I told them to just pretend nothing happened, because that's what I was going to do. It's what I had to do; I couldn't let anyone else know.

I sat up and went and got my purse at my desk. I told Susie and Frankie that I was going to head home and I would be back in a few hours. Frankie said he would take me back to my place, but I told him he didn't have to. Frankie insisted and I didn't really care his car was still at my place anyways. Frankie started walking me towards the corridor, but then he noticed my nervousness and heavy breathing. We turned around and headed towards the elevator. I told Frankie to let go of me, I explained to him he wasn't my boyfriend, and that the only reason I was letting him hold me while I slept was for the feeling of safety. We went through the elevator and up to the third floor leaving Susie in the lab alone. I was just trying to hide my face from the officer at the desk while I made it out the door, also trying to keep at least two feet of distance between Frankie and I, as to hide suspicion. Someone said Dr. Isles and I didn't even turn around to see who it was, I just ran straight out the double glass doors into the parking lot hoping the person who's voice was didn't follow me.

As Frankie and I got to the car he was still being a gentleman and opened the passenger door for me. It only took us five minutes to get back to my home, but it felt like longer because of the awkward silence and short glances between us. As we parked the car I walked in the house, and left Frankie to get in his own car to go home. I saw Angela at the counter drinking her coffee and ready for work with her keys in her hands. She asked if I had a hot date and let out I slight chuckle. I heard her speak, but I didn't really process it, I was too focused on getting to take a shower. I walked straight past her and went into my room and locked the door behind me. I never turned around, I was just hoping Angela was going to leave for work and I could have some time alone for a moment to process everything. Angela must have followed me and because she started knocking on the door and saying my name in question form. She was asking if I was okay because she heard me crying. I told her I was fine, and I was just tired from a long night of work; but she knew I was lying, how could she not, this wasn't like me.

I went into the bathroom and turned on the shower. I removed my clothes and stared at myself in the mirror, noticing every cut and bruise on my body. This was the first time I really got to see myself since the attack, surprisingly I didn't look as bad as I thought I did; maybe I would be able to pull this keeping my attack a secret thing off. As I stepped in the shower even more tears fell from me face from the hot water hitting my freshly stitched wounds. I sat down on the showers tile and closed my eyes. I remembered every detail of what happened the night before and all I wanted to do was forget. I cried and cried, wondering why Jennings and Malinski would even want to rape me. I thought they were that they were good men!

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><p><strong> I will plan on posting one chapter a week by Friday. I may post more randomly, depending on my amounts of free time. <strong>

**Thanks for reading my story and hope you enjoy it. Reviews would be great!**

**:::Special Thanks to Terri411 for liking my story:::**


	3. Chapter 3

** Chapter 3 Moving Forward Fanfiction**

I was on the shower floor for nearly twenty minutes. I had finally washed all the blood and dirt off of me, but I still felt so dirty and used. I wished I had more time, but I knew it wouldn't make me feel any better and I had to go back to work. When I thought of working after what I had just been through I thought about calling in sick. If I had called in sick though people would be asking me all kinds of questions, and I knew I couldn't sit and answer all of them. People would be very suspicious of me, because I never get sick.

I wrapped myself in a towel and laid down in my bed, still dreading what happened. It felt like a dream, how could I be so stupid or how could I have not fought harder. But how could I have predicted that this would happen, especially from someone I know. Suddenly my phone rang, I picked it up in my hand to look at and Jack was calling me. I cleared my throat and answered it still sounding weak from my voice disappearing. He was calling about our dinner plans with all of our friends at my house tonight. I completely forgot, I almost wanted to cancel but then I told him he should come by at 7 and I hung up the phone. I wasn't looking forward to everyone coming over and having to be in a room full of people I love that I have to lie to.

I went and put on another one of my black turtleneck sweaters and a pair of light washed color of skinny jeans with my black boots. I didn't even bother with my hair, but I did my makeup to hide the surprisingly very few bruises on my face. I knew that if the detectives didn't want me to tell anyone, they would want to make sure I didn't look like I had been attacked.

I walked back into the kitchen seeing Angela and now Jane waiting for me. I grabbed a cup of coffee and knelt over the counter and put my head in my hands rubbing my forehead. They asked if anything was wrong and I just said I was tired. I wasn't lying I really was tired, but I didn't answer the question they really asked. They were laughing and asking if Jack Armstrong, the professor that I am dating, and I were at his place last night. I told them I was just working on a case all night and lost track of time. It wouldn't have been the first time I have ever done that so they couldn't be surprised, but we weren't working any big cases at this time and they looked puzzled. I then began telling them about a cold case that was being reopened, but I never told them I didn't start testing any of the evidence.

I then quickly ended the conversation and said I would be back at four to help finish up dinner. Jane and Angela both took the day off so they could cook, and spend a little quality time together even though Jane wasn't looking forward to it. I had a few things I had to finish up in the office before I could help with dinner, and I really wanted to spend as much time as possible away from Jane.

When I got to the office I took the elevator again, still worried that I could have a panic attack going through the corridor. I saw Susie look up from her microscope at me with the same face she had before I left. Everybody else looked the exact same they always did as they greeted me in the morning. It was like nothing happened, people didn't even know what I had just been through. How could no one tell that something was wrong? It's just not fair, what did I do to deserve this? Maybe I will never get the answer, like many other rape victims never get to understand why. Or maybe I will understand in the future, but right now I wanted to forget that it ever happened and go back to my life.

I stepped into the autopsy room with Susie following me. She lightly placed her and on my shoulder and as I jumped away she asked if I was okay. I lied and said I was fine, and that I needed to just finish up my work so I could go home. I grabbed a stack of papers on the tray next to the Caucasian males body under the white sheet. I began marking down his information that I gathered from the previous night. I paused while Susie left, before I shed a single tear falling slowly down my left cheek. I felt so broken and out of place; something wasn't right, I didn't feel like myself anymore.

It took me only fifteen minutes to do all the paperwork, and decided I needed to take the day off. I knew the people I the lab would be suspicious, but I didn't care. I couldn't last any longer being in the same building as my attackers. I went to the phone on the wall and paged Dr. Popov to come to the autopsy room. When he entered I told him I was giving him my cases for the next week while I took some vacation time. He didn't even question me; he had a huge grin on his face. He loved it when I put him in charge, he always hoped for some reason I would screw up so he could take my place as Chief Medical Examiner of Boston Massachusetts.

I walked back into the lab and told all the technicians that Popov was in charge and I would be back in a week. They all looked at me so concerned about what brought on my decision, but I told them that I was fine and I was going to take some vacation time for once.

I saw Frankie walking into the lab to check on me and I gave a tiny smile as I looked at him. I always thought Frankie was cute, but for some reason my attack made me think of him differently. The way he held me in his arms and made me feel safe gave me some clarity in the messed up life I had at the moment. Everything that I knew changed so quickly, but Frankie was the only person that might actual help me get through this.

As Frankie walked over to me I grabbed his hand and told him that I finally decided it was time to go through the back again. He understood and knew that I wanted him to go with me. The corridor was the quickest way to my car, and I knew it was safer with Frankie by my side to protect me. As we were walking I clenched onto Frankie as if my life depended on it, and it sort of did. When we made it to my car I let go of Frankie and gave him a peck on the cheek before saying thank you and getting in my car. I locked the doors as soon as I got in and rolled down the window telling Frankie I would see him later before I started to drive away. I wanted to go anywhere but where I was right now, and I needed to just clear my thoughts for a little while.

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><p><strong>I am sorry I didn't update sooner like I wanted to, but I did update by the time I said I would. <strong> **I hope everyone had a Merry Christmas and I wish you a Happy New Year! I will try to update sooner this week, but if not I will have a chapter ready next Friday. **

**-Thanks for reading-**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4 Moving Forward Fanfiction**

I had been driving for four hours and it was nearly two p.m. I just drove all around Boston, hoping to try and forget what happened. And for a brief moment while I saw a man helping an elderly lady across the street, I did forget all my problems. I had my phone off so I didn't have to talk to anyone. I made my way back into my driveway and sat in my car for a good five minutes before heading inside. I was trying to calm myself from all the crying I had done. I fixed my make up in the mirror and put a smile on my face, even though it hurt.

Once I was inside there was a great smell of Turkey roasting in the oven. It was Thanksgiving and I was the only one's house with enough space for twelve people. Angela and Jane turned their heads from the couch and said, "You're home early?" I smiled and told them I finished up my work as fast as I could. They told me they finished everything and that they were just waiting on the Turkey to be done at seven. I was sort of relieved that I didn't have to cook. I had been sitting in a car all day, but I still had no energy and my entire body was throbbing from the pain my wounds were giving me.

I plopped down on the chair next to the couch and let out a slight cry from the pain. They looked at me and asked if I was okay. It took me a second but I told them I was just a little sore. That wasn't true though, I was in so much pain and the cut on my abdomen was way worse then I thought it would be. When they heard me say I was sore they chuckled and said they knew what it was from. I started to panic. Did they really know what happened, but how? They could barely say it as they were laughing that Jack and I must have had a lot of fun.

This made me slightly angry that they were making these accusations; anyways Jack was the furthest thing from my mind. I let out a quiet sigh of relief and I just smiled back at them hoping to make everything seem okay, even though nothing was okay. I didn't know what the attackers would do to me if I told anyone; I knew it wouldn't be good.

I stood up and walked back over to the kitchen. I opened my liquor cabinet above the fridge and grabbed a bottle of Jack Daniels Whiskey; I never really like it much and kept it for when Frankie came over, but it was all I had that would get me as drunk as possible as fast as possible. I just took the whole bottle and sat down on the chair again. Jane and Angela looked at me with such disbelief that I was going to drink it, but I took off the cap and chugged a fourth of the bottle. When I finally put down the bottle they were staring at me. I just told them it had been a long day, and then I quickly corrected myself under my breath and said a long couple of days. They became a little concerned, but brushed it off and went back to looking at the television.

I got up and told them that I was going to go lay down until everyone got here, but I was hoping for some reason no one would show up. They began looking at me extremely concerned; I never took naps in the middle of the day, but thy stilled brushed it off like it was no big deal. I made it up the stairs and laid down in my fluffy bed. I thought I would be safe there. Truth be told I didn't feel safe anywhere, unless Frankie was there holding me. I fell asleep very quickly from the whiskey, and my lack of sleep from the night before.

I was suddenly woken when the doorbell rang. I looked up at my clock and it was already seven, I didn't want to get up and go be in a room full of people. I heard many voices. I got up and went downstairs to a room full of smiling people.

Jack came up and wrapped me in his arms and put a huge kiss on my lips. I pulled away quickly and ran to the sink and threw up. He asked what was wrong baby and came up behind me and grabbed my hips and pressed me against the counter. I closed my eyes and let out a light cry, before Frankie asked if I was okay. Jack turned me around and held his body against mine. I began breathing very heavily because I could feel him getting hard under his jeans. I just wanted him to let go of me. I pushed him away and slid out away from him. I told everyone I needed a minute and went out on the front porch just trying to regain my sense of stability.

Angela came out and found me on the stairs in tears. She came down and knelt next to me and wrapped me in her arms. I didn't feel completely safe, but I felt like everything might turn out okay. She told me she knew something was wrong and asked me what happened. I hesitated telling her I was attacked, but I knew how stubborn she could be. As we began talking Frankie came out and sat on the bottom step with his back turned to us just listening. When we were done we all went back in the house, and it suddenly hit me. I pulled Angela to the side and begged her not to tell anyone else, and Frankie nodded to her reassuring her that I was going to be okay, but he really didn't know if I was alright or would ever be. She looked at me with such concern and promised me she wouldn't.

Everyone else was already at the table waiting for us. They were all looking at Angela concerned, because she had been crying from what I had told her. I looked fine, because by now I knew how to put myself together and seem alright. I went and sat down near Jack and placed my hand on his that was already on the table. We all began to spread the food around the table and ate a dinner full of smiles and laughter. There were a few awkward glances between me and the people that knew about my attack, and yet no one else noticed.

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><p><strong>I had some free time today, so I decided to post another chapter. I will still put up at least one more chapter before Friday. <strong>

**Thanks for reading!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5 Moving Forward Fanfiction**

Once we finished our Thanksgiving dinner we moved into the living room and all settled down around the coffee table. As I sat down next to Jack he wrapped me in his arms and I pushed away from him again. I went to the kitchen counter and grab the Whiskey bottle again and chugged another fourth of it down. Everyone was staring at me wondering why I was so strange, Jane became very worried and told me she new something was wrong and wanted to know what it was. I closed my eyes getting flashbacks from my attack and my hands started shaking. I began raising my voice at Jane saying to her everything was fine and to just move on and forget about it. Jack started to yell at me asking why the fuck I wouldn't let him touch me, he asked if I was sleeping with someone else. This made me angrier because I never would cheat on anyone. I couldn't form words I was scared, and I was still shaking. He started walking toward me and I closed my eyes and dropped the bottle on the floor; I thought he was going to hit me. Jack noticed my reaction and stepped back again. He told me to either tell him why before he finished counting to three or we were over. By the time he got to three I still had no answer; he then became upset and said, "Goodbye Maura!" and walked out the door.

Once I heard those words I turned around and grabbed my coat and boots and ran out into the freshly fallen snow. As I closed the door I heard Angela, Susie, and Frankie simultaneously yell my name. I didn't know where I was going, but I wasn't staying at that house anymore. I couldn't get in my car I already had too much to drink. I went to the park and laid down in the snow, hoping it would give me some sense of feeling. I couldn't breathe; I sat up and looked back down at the snow underneath me. The snow was red, I must have split open my stitches while running. Then everything was suddenly dark and very cold.

When I woke up I was in a hospital bed with Jane, Angela, and Susie by my side. I looked around and no one else was in the room. I was hoping Frankie was there so he could hold me, but it probably wasn't the best idea since we would never work out anyways. Jane asked what had happened and I looked at Angela and Susie. I told Jane I was mugged at the grocery store the previous day, and that it was nothing. She believed me, and asked why I didn't tell her. I told her not to worry about it and that I was fine.

Jane's phone rang and she told me she was sorry but she had to go to the department. As Jane walked out the doctor walked in and the first words I said to him were, "When can I leave?" he told me I was able to leave whenever I want, but to just keep my wounds taken care of. I sat up and put on my clothes the fastest I possibly could. I signed the release forms two minutes later and was wheeled out of the hospital by Angela. It was eleven o'clock at night by the time we got back to the house.

I ran inside up the stairs and into my room. I went to the closet and quickly packed my two suitcases with as much as I possibly could. I came back down and went to the safe I had hidden in my bookcase and pulled out everything in it that I would need. Angela and Susie the entire time were screaming at me to stop. I grabbed my keys from the counter making sure to leave my phone and went to my car.

Angela came up and grabbed me and told me to tell them what I was doing. I didn't have an answer, because I didn't know what I was doing. By this time I was in tears my head was spinning so fast and I just knew I couldn't be where I was right now. I got in my car and sped away as fast as I could. I looked in the rearview mirror and saw Angela on her cell phone, and I instantly knew she was calling Jane.

When I slightly figure out what I was doing and drove towards the airport. I then realized I couldn't just leave Boston, and there was one place I wanted to be at more. I made a left towards an apartment building and parked my car in the back alley so no one would see it. As I went inside up to the third floor I was praying I could stay with Frankie for a little while.

I made my way to the door number 32 and began knocking. Frankie opened the door immediately and let me inside. He knew exactly why I was there and told me as he closed the door that I could stay as long as I liked. He asked me if I needed anything, and I said, "I just need you to hold me!"


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6 Moving Forward Fanfiction**

As he came over to sit on the couch he turned on some calming music and wrapped me in his arms. We sat there quietly for twenty minutes before I heard him fall asleep. I just listened to him breathing slowly and inched my way down until my head was in his lap looking up at him. I fell asleep about fifteen minutes later, even though I didn't want to.

I woke up screaming and Frankie was nowhere near me. I started freaking out when I saw someone come around the dark hallway. The voice said, "It's me more, it's Frankie." He then came and knelt down next to me and told me everything was fine and I was just dreaming. I was in tears and I told him it wasn't a dream. I looked at me sadly and placed a kiss on my forehead. Frankie told me he wasn't going to let anything else bad happen to me before I gave him a weak smile.

He had told me he needed to go to work, and then I realized it was six thirty. I didn't know I slept that long, it felt like I only slept twenty minutes. Frankie said he would be back as soon as possibly and would check in on me throughout the day. I didn't want him to leave, but I knew he needed to. Frankie said he wouldn't tell anyone where I was, even Jane so that I was safe. I thanked him for this.

I got up off the couch to close the door behind him, but before I knew it I had kissed him goodbye. I didn't understand why I kissed him, I just did. It wasn't the first time we had kissed, but this time I made the first move. I didn't know what to say except sorry, but Frankie said I didn't need to apologize and walked out the door. I stood there for a second trying to figure out why I kissed him, but I didn't have an answer. It wasn't like we had our tongues down each others throats, it was just a peck on the lips. It meant something though; I didn't know what, but it did.

A week had gone by and it was time for me to stop hiding from everyone. I had to go back to work and relieve Popov even though he would still love to be in charge. I didn't want to go though, Frankie and I had been having fun together. He kept me from worrying and made me feel safe; Frankie and I just watched movies, talked, and played Chess the entire week. We both wanted more to happen, but I needed a little time to recover before I became intimate with anyone. The thought of anyone touching me other then Frankie made me sick.

It was four thirty in the evening and I packed up my things and told Frankie it was time for me to go. He helped me carry my stuff to my car and we hugged for a good five minutes before I got in and drove away. It wasn't like we were never going to see each other again, but it meant that all the attractions that were between us had to go away.

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><p><strong>Sorry the chapter was short, but I posted two today!<strong>

**-TIP FOR ALL OF YOU HATERS-**

**IF YOU DONT LIKE MY STORY DON'T READ IT!**

**COMPLAINING ISN'T GOING TO GET YOU ANYWHERE, SO LEAVING A REVEIW SAYING MY STORY IS STUPID, GROSS, AND I SHOULD DELETE IT THEN I WILL IGNORE YOU. **


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7 Moving Forward Fanfiction**

Once I pulled into my driveway I saw Angela exiting the front door in her fuzzy pink bathrobe and matching slippers. She walked towards my car and asked me if I was okay, and I told her I was fine. I told her that I was staying with a friend during the week and explained to her that I realized now I couldn't run from my problems. I had told her that I was at least going to get help moving on from my attack, but I wasn't sure if I was going to press charges yet.

We made our way inside and I told Angela to sit down on the couch and relax while I made us some tea. She kept insisting that she do it, but I told her it was my turn to take care of someone instead of the other way around. She finally let me have my way and sat at the counter instead to make a compromise since she wanted to talk to me.

Angela asked me what friend I was staying with, since my only friend was Jane and she knew I wasn't with her. I told her it was someone that I trusted very much and would never hurt me. I never told her it was Frankie, because if I did she would be asking all kinds of questions and would tell Jane.

It wasn't that Jane would be mad. Jane was my best friend and I loved her more then anything, but Frankie was her brother and if something bad every happened between us Jane would be put in a compromising position and have to choose sides. Jane and I have been friends for many years, and because we were so close people always thought that we were in a relationship, but we just had an amazing friendship. Jane still had Casey, even though that was complicated. Jane loved him, even if she had trouble admitting it. Jane was like my sister and we have been friends for many years, and I would never want to risk doing anything to destroy our relationship. I am afraid I might have already destroyed are relationship though, from lying to her and not telling her about my attack.

I lost myself for a moment thinking about all of this and then I looked at Angela. I told her I was just thinking about some stuff I had to do at work. Angela believed me, because normally when I lie I get hives but I didn't. I wondered why I wasn't getting hives anymore, maybe I wasn't getting as nervous as I usually am when lying. I returned to talking to Angela again and asked her how her week was. She said she was busy at the café, but nothing new really happened. I nodded my head slightly as I passed her the freshly made Chai Tea. I then pulled out the chair next to her and joined her at the counter.

Angela and I talked for about twenty minutes or so before I told her I was going to bed. We had talked about Jack most of the time, and I told her that that was over. I liked Jack a lot, but I could never see us having much of a future together. Jack would never want to touch me again anyways after what I've been through. Its not like we had much time for even a friendship before everything went shitty. I told Angela that I was going to call Jack in the morning and officially say it was over, even though Jack had already ended it.

I went up to my room and removed my clothes slowly before getting a quick shower. I looked at myself in the mirror afterwards at my cuts and bruises that were healing surprisingly fast. The bruises on my wrists from when I was handcuffed looked almost invisible. You could still see some black and blue, but if you weren't looking for them you wouldn't really notice them. The wound on my stomach was still sore, but what was I to expect from a wound that needed 16 stitches. The bruising on my face had gone away, it helped that while I was with Frankie I didn't try and cover them up with anything.

I sat at the foot of my bed trying to decide what I should do. I wanted to move on with my life, but if I have to pass by them every time I go to work I don't think I could handle that. I regretted my decision before I even made it, but I picked up my phone and started to dial. I heard it ring four times before someone answered. On the other end it was a deep voice and one that I recognized. I asked if we could meet tomorrow at six for dinner at a local diner to talk, he agreed and hung up.

I knew it was going to be a long night. I wasn't going to get any sleep, and all I would be able to think about is what I'm going to talk to him about. I wasn't looking forward to my conversation with him and just hoped it would go smoothly.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8 Moving Forward Fanfiction**

It was eight o'clock when I decided I should get up and start my day. I was tired, but I had stuff I had to do. For the first time since my attack I was feeling slightly goo about myself and decided I would put on my favorite electric blue dress. I did my hair and just put some mascara on, because now I was sort of used to not wearing much make up. I went and sat in my bench in the window seal and started to dial Jack's number on my cell phone. When he answered I told him I wanted to see him and asked if he could stop by soon. He seemed angry, but he agreed. I was ready to say it was over, but that wasn't like me I needed to at least explain to him why it was over.

I went down stairs and saw Angela in the kitchen ready to go to work. I told her Jack was stopping by and then I would meet her at the precinct. She then grabbed her purse and left. I drank my coffee and waited maybe ten minutes before Jack showed up. When he arrived I asked him to sit on the couch and I sat in the chair to the left of him. I told him that we were over and started to explain why when he cut me off. He told me that we should never have met in the first place. I began to get upset because I thought there was at least some chemistry between us, and we could of at least have been friends. I blurted out to Jack that I was attacked. He seemed shocked by this and then started to look at me with pity and apologize. I explained to him what happened and that it would just not work out between us.

I never told Jack who attacked, other then that I worked with them. I wasn't ready to tell anyone who it was, at least until I got an explanation of why I was attacked. I didn't want to tell anyone, especially because if I did they would come after me and do it again. I walked Jack to his car and before he got in he hugged me tightly. I pushed him away and apologized, but I didn't really want him touching me. He apologized and said he should have at least asked first, and I interrupted him and said he had nothing to be sorry for before I walked to my own car.

As I got in I thought about my conversation I was going to have tonight and felt nervous and regretful. I then heard my phone ringing and it was Jane. I answered it as I usually do saying Dr. Maura Isles. Jane asked me if I had anything on the cold case that we reopened. It took me a minute to even figure out what she was talking about and then I told her I forgot about the case and I would get some information to her later in the day. I then hung up the phone and started driving to work.

When I arrived I went down to the lab and just started in on my work. The reason we had reopened the cold case was because it was a twenty-seven year old cop that worked for the precinct who was murdered. The cop was a woman who had been raped and left to die in our own precinct parking lot. Korsak had asked for the case to be reopened because he had worked with the young woman and thought she and her family should at least get some closer after ten years. As I examined the little amount of evidence I had I looked at the crime scene photos I noticed things that were very familiar. I took the evidence up to Jane and asked her to look at it. When I was in the precinct I looked around for Malinski and Jennings but they weren't there. I gave a loud sigh of relief and Jane and Korsak looked at me funny. I told them I just felt nice to see them again after my week off. They asked where I went and I lied yet again and told them I had a medical convention in New York. I then went towards the elevator and Jane followed me.

We were the only ones in the elevator and Jane asked me about Jack, since she was there when Jack said it was over. I told her I talked to him this morning and we agreed that we would never be anything more then friends. She laughed and told me I needed to date someone like Frankie. I then looked at her shocked. She said she wondered why Frankie and I never did at least go out on one date and said that we should sometime. I told her I couldn't because he was her brother. She then said that it was just one date and that she knew Frankie had liked me for a long time. I smiled at her while contemplating on the idea of Jane being okay with Frankie and I as a couple. As I got off the elevator downstairs on the floor of the café Jane told me she loved me and she just wanted me to be happy.

As I walked towards the café I watched the elevator doors close and I accidentally slammed into someone. I began to panic and then I noticed it was Frankie. Frankie looked at me and smiled asking me if I was okay, and I flirtatiously said, " I am now that you're here." We laughed and I told him I was going to see his mother and I would talk to him later. We hugged and he made his way down the hall.

As I entered the café I finally noticed that it was already five thirty. How did the time disappear so quickly? I guess I got really carried away in my work again, but that wasn't a bad thing I needed something to keep me busy. I then told Angela that I would be home by 8, and if I wasn't to look for me. She became very nervous and I told her I was going to meet one of my attackers for dinner and that I think I had an explanation on why I was attacked. She blurted out, " Are you Insane?" and I told her that I had to do this and that I was going to be okay.

I left Angela there in fear for me, but I needed to tell someone that if for some reason I didn't come home to look for me. I made my way to my car and took one last look at the precinct and started driving to the diner. When I finally made it my stomach dropped and I could hardly breathe, Malinski was outside and walking towards my car.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9 Moving Forward Fanfiction**

Malinksi opened my car door and reached out his arm to help me out. I pushed it away and stood up. I tried to act really confident and not scared to the point were I was ready to pass out. I brushed passed him and walked towards the dinner. As I walked in there were only five booths filled with customers and two people at the counter. I was hoping there would be more people to witness if anything happened. Malinski came up behind me placing his hand on my back to lead me to a booth. I cringed at his touch and closed my eyes for a second remembering the attack.

How could I be so stupid to come and meet my attacker, this wasn't like me. I wasn't thinking as logically as I should be, but my attack had changed me and I probably would never be the same person I was. I was just hoping I would at least think logically again at some point.

As I slid into the booth, Malinksi slid in on the opposite side to look at me. I just stared at him watching his every move. When the waitress came up to the table with the menus that was the first time either of us spoke a word. I told her I wasn't going to eat anything and to just bring me a glass of water. Malinksi ordered a coffee with some toast and jam. How could he eat right now? I couldn't imagine eating right now. At least I was smarter in my decision to get water. If Malinski put anything in my drink I would be able to tell.

I watched Malinski scarf down his bread and coffee before I decided to speak. I told him I knew it was Jennings and him that attacked me. I told him I knew why they did it and that they weren't going to get away with it. He leaned in and grabbed me by my hair and pulled me closer to him. He said I had two choses either I make it go away or they would come after me again. I told him to let me go and got up from the table.

As I walked out the door I saw Angela, Susie and Frankie running towards me. I was actually relieved to see them even though I didn't want Angela to tell anyone what I was doing. But to be fair I never told her not to say anything so I couldn't be too angry. Frankie came up and grabbed me and pulled me in his arms. He finally loosened his grip when Malinksi walked out. Frankie asked me if the was him, but I froze and couldn't say anything. He pulled away and walked towards Malinksi. Frankie threw a punch and knocked him to the ground. Frankie then said to him the only reason he hadn't killed him yet was because I was right there.

Frankie then walked towards me and said he was staying with me tonight. I didn't even argue with him, I wanted him to stay and keep me safe. We all walked to the car together and Angela and I got in the back seat while Frankie drove, Susie agreed to drive my car home for me and said she would meet us there. It wasn't a long car ride, but I managed to fall asleep quickly.

When I woke up I was already on the couch in my house. I looked at the clock and realized I had been sleeping for an hour with no memory of even getting out of the car. I sat up and saw the three of them sitting at the counter talking. I stood and walked towards them saying that they could have woken me up. I got no answer other then their smiles. Susie then said that she was going to leave now that she knows I'm okay. Angela said she would walk her out and that she was going to the guest house and going to bed as well. Now it was just me and Frankie in the kitchen alone.

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><p><strong>Sorry it wasn't much this week, but it was something. I still don't know how i'm getting there just yet, but i do know what the ending is going to be. <strong>

**I know that people keep saying that this isn't Maura and i'm sorry. Many people have different reactions to assault and losing all sense of self and stability is one of them. I am sorry if it's not what you wanted, but if Maura was ever ****attacked i would think this would be slightly how she would react.**


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10 Moving Forward Fanfiction**

I pulled a seat out and asked Frankie to sit down. I leaned across the counter and cupped his hands in mine. I thanked him for saving me tonight. I then asked him if he would come with me tomorrow to talk to Jane and Korsak before I talk to lieutenant Cavanaugh about my assault and pressing charges. I explained to him about the cold case and how Jennings and Malinski had done it. I told him I would not be able to live with myself if what happened to me happened to someone else. Frankie said it was the right thing to do and it was up to me. He told me he would support me in any decision I made whether it was keeping it a secret or telling everyone about what happened.

Frankie stood up and wrapped his arms tightly around me. I placed my hands on his chest and leaned slightly back so I could look into his eyes, and he was tearing up but from love not sadness. I said to Frankie that just for tonight I wanted to forget the rest of the world and just be us alone. He asked what I meant by that because he wanted to be sure he understood what I meant. I told him all I wanted was him, I explained to him that I wanted him to make my feel loved and no longer violated.

Frankie placed his hand on my cheek and used his other around my waist to pull me closer to him before placing a kiss on my lips. His lips were soft and made me feel like I never wanted to leave them. Our tongues danced and were amazing together, but I wanted more of him. I wrapped my hands around his neck and as he backed me up against the counter. I pulled my lips away from his to help him remove his black collared shirt so I could reach some of his skin. Our lips met again and he pressed himself firmly against me on the counter trying his best not to hurt me. I caressed my fingers of Frankie's muscles wondering how I never noticed how big they were. He reached his hands down to my thighs to pull up my dress slightly, I gasped at the feeling of him touching me. Frankie picked me up and I wrapped my legs around his waist. He carried me towards the bedroom slightly bumping into the walls because he refused to part his lips from mine.

Frankie set me down by the foot of the bed and began removing my turtleneck so he could reach more skin. He pulled away to look at me. I still had cuts and bruises on me and he cringed at the thought of what my attackers did to me. He said, "Maybe we shouldn't do this, I don't want to hurt you." I looked into Frankie's eyes and told him that I knew he wouldn't, and if he did he didn't mean to. I did question myself for half a second to make sure this is what I want truly, but it didn't take me long to figure out that this is what I always wanted. He still seemed hesitant, and I grabbed his right hand and placed it on my abdomen where my wound was. I looked into his eyes and told him it was okay and I needed him more then anything else. I stood and knelt closer to him and placed a single kiss on his chest before stroking my hands in his dark colored hair. Frankie didn't want to disappoint me and I could tell he wanted me too but he was just afraid he would hurt me. Then he unzipped my skirt and grabbed my ass, I slightly jumped at the feeling even though I was expecting it. I reached down and unbuckled his belt and then removed his pants.

I lied down on the bed, Frankie following on top of me. He was being so gentle as he placed his soft kisses all over my body making sure to have touched every part of me. I sat up as he unclasped my black lace bra. He started caressing my left breast and then my right, but I kept hurrying him along. All I wanted was Frankie. I reached up and pulled down his boxers so that he was completely exposed.

The more I moved my body hurt. I could feel my abdomen practically throbbing in pain. I wanted to cry because it hurt so bad, but I didn't. I didn't want Frankie to know how much pain I was in because then he would say we had to stop, and that was the last thing I wanted.

Frankie then stood off the bed slightly to remove my black underwear before laying back down on top of me. As we kissed I could feel how hard he was and I wanted him. I wanted to feel him fill every part of me. I reached down and placed him at my entrance before staring up into his eyes. He asked me if I was sure, and I nodded and told him there was nothing I wanted more. He then slowly made his way inside of me being careful to not cause any pain as I got used to him. Once inside he placed a kiss on my forehead and started to move slowly. He sped up gradually doing his best to check my reaction and make sure I wasn't needing him to stop. I felt so safe during these moments and all I could think about is how I never wanted it to end. But I didn't have a choice I was climaxing before I knew it and we both reached our limits. While coming down Frankie had slightly collapsed on top of me, but did his best to keep himself from crushing me.

It wasn't hot steamy sex, but it was still surprisingly the best I have ever had. All that we shared in that moment was LOVE. It didn't take me by surprise while Frankie was getting off of me that he said he loved me. I told him I loved him too and stood up off the bed with him. We had known each other many years, and after this moment it began to feel like we somehow had always been together and were meant to always be together. We made are way to the side of the bed and lifted the covers. When we got in Frankie pulled me as close as he possibly could and we drifted off to sleep rather quickly.

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><p><strong>I am sorry I didn't update on Friday this week, I was really busy yesterday and forgot to post my chapter. To make up for the late update I have another chapter coming up right after this.<strong>

**Also I just got to see The Hobbit: the battle of the five armies last night and it was amazing. I had so many emotional problems for like two hours afterwards since Kili and Tauriel didn't end up together. I loved that couple in the movie. I know Tauriel was never in the books and I never read the books. To be honest in my opinion if she wasn't in the movie it wouldn't be as good. Every type of story needs some kind of romance. I may write a story on them so if you think I should let me know. **


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11 Moving Forward Fanfiction**

It was the next morning and Frankie had his arm laid across me to make me feel safe. It was a long night. I woke up three times because of my nightmares, but it was normal behavior from what I had been through. The only thing that helped me through the night was Frankie, he made sure I was safe and never let me out of his sight even when I had to pee. It wasn't that awkward though because of the events of the night before.

I stood up and put on Frankie's shirt from the floor and asked him if he wanted some coffee. As we walked towards the kitchen we were trying to listen to make sure Angela wasn't in the kitchen. We both agreed we weren't ready for anyone to know until we got my whole mess figured out. Angela had already left leaving a note on the counter saying she was meeting Jane.

I was extremely sore and could barely move, but I kept trying to hide it form Frankie because I didn't want him to feel bad. He noticed though when I slammed into the counter and fell to the ground in tears. Frankie picked me up in his arms even though that would still cause me pain and carried me to the couch were it was softer. He then lifted the shirt to look at my wound but it wasn't bleeding I was just in a lot of pain. I told him I was fine and we needed to get ready so I can talk to everyone. He let me up and we went upstairs just leaving our coffee.

We took a shower together to cut down on time, but I couldn't let him touch me I was just in too much pain at the moment. Once we were dressed we went straight to the car and drove towards the precinct. I had him stop so I could get something for my pain and help me get through today. Once we arrived and walked inside I started breathing heavily and stressing about having to tell my friends what happened. Frankie and I passed by the café to the elevators.

The elevator doors opened and Jane and Korsak were in it. They said they were getting ready to get some breakfast and I asked them to first come down to my office. They looked really concerned as Frankie and I entered the elevator. The ride was silent but once outside my office Korsak asked what tis was about. Frankie just said he needed to hear what I was about to tell them and to come in. I told them to sit down on the couch including Frankie as I sat at my desk looking at them.

I apologized first and told Jane I was sorry for lying to her at first and not telling her what happened to me. I was unsure how to say it so I just blurted out that I was attacked. I told them in gruesome detail on what happened and who did it. I told them I was sorry it took so long for me to come forward, but I was afraid. Jane, Korsak and Frankie were shedding a couple of tears, but I was full blown crying trying to catch my breath.

After about five minutes Jane spoke and said she was so sorry that this happened to me, and that she was going to make Jennings and Malinski pay for what they did. I told her she wasn't going to do anything, and that I was going to go tell Cavanaugh about the attack and get them possibly arrested. I told them that I didn't want Malinski and Jennings dead, but that I wanted them to suffer in prison more. Prison isn't a good place for former cops so I knew I could actually get my revenge. I stood up from my desk with Frankie walking towards me making sure I was okay. I told Jane and Korsak I would see them soon before Frankie and I left my office.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12 Moving Forward Fanfiction**

When Frankie and I walked into Cavanaugh's office he seemed shocked that I was in there. It wasn't normal for me to see him, let alone be in his office. He asked if something was wrong. I looked down at my hands that were fidgeting and quietly said, "I have to tell you something."

Frankie ushered me to the chairs in the front of his desk and sat me down. I started to tear up telling him what Jennings and Malinski did. Cavanaugh apologized and said he was sorry that this happened to me, then he said he wasn't going to let them get away with it. He told Frankie to get Angela and take both of us home out of the shit storm that was about to happen. Frankie peeked out the door checking for the two detectives before bringing me out to the elevators.

We met Angela in the café and Frankie told her to take the rest of the day off. It didn't take long for her to realize what was going to happen from the expression on my face. Angela took off her apron and grabbed her purse rather quickly trying to leave as soon as possible. On our way out the front doors we passed my attackers and they looked at me funny. As we were practically running down the steps I heard Malinski yelling, "You Bitch!" before I got in the car.

Later that night I was sitting on my porch noticing how much calmer life was now. I saw a Jane's car come up the driveway with Korsak in the passenger seat and Cavanaugh in the back. As they got out of their car they looked at me with relief that I was okay and safe. As they walked towards the steps Frankie came out and sat next to me giving me a slight peck on the lips. I thought Jane would be mad, but she began to smile. Which made me smile, knowing that she was okay with it. Cavanaugh spoke first saying, "We got them!" Korsak then followed with, "Because of the rape kit you got done by Susie and the cold case report, they will not be getting out of prison anytime soon, if ever." Jane then said, "It's okay Maura, they will never hurt you or anyone else again." I smiled and thanked them all for their support, and told them that even though it was going to be long MOVING FORWARD that I was going to get through this. Then Angela joined us just in time before I began telling Korsak that his limp was from an in-grown toe nail that he likely had.

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><p><strong>Sorry it was so short, but I am going to end it here. I might make a sequel later on, but for now I'm going to take a break from writing. <strong>

**Thanks For Reading!**


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